Back to work?

Para el link en español, pincha aquí…vuelta-al-trabajo

Before beginning this post, I would love to ask all mums out there, was it hard for you to go back to work? Did you ever imagine before that it was going to be that tough? Do you have family that helps if baby/kid is sick? when did you put your baby into daycare?
Please, share your experiences!Please!

Well, this is a topic that recently affected me.

When my baby was 9 months, I decided that was a good time to put him into daycare and start looking for a job.
But I´ll first explain my personal situation. My baby was born in January (in Australia) and we moved to New Zealand when he was just 3 months old. As you can imagine, we didn´t know many people so when my husband had to go to work the only person that I could talk to (if you can consider that talking), was my little baby.

Then a bit of time came by, we met other people with kids and some of them were already working. ¨How could they do it? ¨
At the beginning I thought, ¨I just need to go back to work and have adult conversations¨ But the thought of leaving my baby with some strangers pushed me back.

At the end, I decided to start looking for a job
¨Lets start part time¨I said.
And I got it. I got a part time role, where I only had to go to work 3 days a week. Pretty good to start with, as the baby only had to be at daycare a few hours a day.

Let me tell you. I remember I went to 8 different daycares to make sure I was choosing the right one, and when I decided  which one was the winner I went for the second time with the little one to let them know I wanted to enroll my son with them.
As soon as I tell them they said:
¨Ok, let´s start now. You can go to a coffee shop nearby to read all the information and he can stay here for an hour, to see how he goes¨

¨OMG!!!! To see how he goes? What about me? I´m the one already struggling with the idea…¨
I still remember that horrible feeling. I was going to be away from him. I was going to leave him with people that I didn´t know anything about. How could I be such a bad mum?
But I did it. And first thing I did on my way to the coffee shop was called my parents. I needed to call them and cry… cry because I was already missing him, because I felt so bad, because I needed them to let me know I was doing something right, because they were once in my same situation.

4 months have gone and my kid has been going to the same daycare since. At the beginning was only for 4 hours a day and then increasing little by little.
He loves that place. He´s learning, making friends, interacting, getting sick every now and then and the teachers not only help him, but also me. They help me orientating me with his different stages and more.

But this doesn´t end up here. He´s now 1 year old (13 months to be more specific) and I just started a full time job.
I though that I wasn´t going to feel this way again, but adding 2 more hours without seeing that little precious made me cry… yes, again.
On my first day at work I was anxious to come back home and see his little face. First thing he did when he saw me was given me a huge hug that made my eyes so watery that I could even fill a sea.

Before having him, I never had this feeling before. I remember when I moved to this side of the world I felt devastated leaving my parents and brother so far away, like a piece of my heart was taken away, but this…. this was something out of this world, an unmanageable feeling.

Like all those moms and dads reading this post that have kids, I love my baby and I sometimes think that I´m the only one that knows how to look after him or take care of him, but there are pretty good trained people that every now and them teach me new ways to do things, and sometimes I just don´t realized that my kid is starting to be a little boy and not a baby anymore… But we all know, he´ll be my baby even when he´s 30 years old.

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